Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Play Ball. Get Paid.

Pretty much follows, doesn't it? Once again we are shown the true, caring, altruism of the diet industry in their attempts to push into an under-exploited market. That market would be; men. Via what they perceive as the most reliable route into the male psyche; sports and Sports Figures. 

You want evidence that the Diet Industry has a definite, profit driven, interest in mind-fucking the worlds populous? Here ya go. They've been doing this little dance with women for YEARS and -well, I was going to say , 'getting away with it', but actually it's more like, 'making oil tanker loads of money'- based on societies twisted ideas about what women 'should' look like and what is 'expected' of them. However, so far they haven't been able to figure out a reliable enough avenue into male body insecurity to make a decent profit. Undermining self image ain't gonna do it, a fashion / trend 'centric approach was never gonna work, even piggybacking onto the FATZ = DETH!11!! terror mongering of the Obesity EpiPanic hasn't proved all that profitable. What's a stalled-out Industrial Complex to do? Work the Youth / Adonis / Sports angles, obviously. They're about the only avenues left to try.

'Adonis' (The, so called, Perfect Body / Six-pack Ads / Gym Butt) angle has been around for years and is based on undermining body image. Your thighs aren't cut, your butt is huge, you've got a gut, you should hate your guns-of-jello biceps, and your bitch tits are disgusting (sound familiar ladies?). The 'Youth' angle is fairly recent, capitalizing on America's throw-away attitude towards anyone over 45. And nothing gets under a mans skin like being perceived as useless. Hence the steady increase in male body implants, face lifts, hair coloring, and the hair replacement business. It's not enough to be a 50 yr old driving an expensive sports car. Now you have to LOOK 25-35 or your just a silly old guy being pathetic. But worry not! Nutrisysdumb is on the case! Working that comfy, familiar, 'Sports' angle!! 

Personally, I noticed them starting to nose in on the market with this angle about 5 years ago and, from a business standpoint, it's only logical. Most guys dream about being just like ___________ (Fill in Blank with designated Athlete) Unfortunately most Athlete's who are still playing already enjoy 'Perfect Body' status, so no joy there, but the retired guys? The Desk Jockeys, Talking Heads, Legends-gone-soft? Pure bankroll. The occasional working athlete who might be 'carrying a little too much' or the Coach on the Sidelines running the show? If you can get a hook in 'um, it's a potential gold strike. So, yeah, PutridSystem is all about pushing up on former sports figures with bags full of money and truckloads of Hokey Meals. And maybe they make a few suggestions about how to pile on some extra Lbs. while waiting for the delivery truck full of patented pseudo-food. Yah know, for those all-important 'Before' photos. Makes the 'After' shots more. . . . Dynamic.  

Right. Just don't try to convince me this clown car full of asshats is out working for the betterment of mens health. Not buying that sentiment or their product. Haven't got time or interest for either.

Muzak Therapy:
Blur / Song 2